Nicole vs. Life
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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