I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
sex in a hospital.. check
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
