Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
worst night to have a conscience
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
