just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize
