So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
