i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
