i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
