why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
As shirtless as possible
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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