My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i dont even know how to be here
Hippo gnu deer
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
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