Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize
