I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
