they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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