GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
