your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
