shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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