Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
