i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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