Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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