cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
two words...techno handjob
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
