She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
