I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
