Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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