And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Let's paint friendship bongs
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
