There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
