Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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