So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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