i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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