no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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