I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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