i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Randomize
