So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Randomize
