his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Randomize
