Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
