You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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