We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
