So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
