remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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