Just mADE A PArabola og urine
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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