Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
