bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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