TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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