Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Randomize
