idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
