I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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