if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
