Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
