Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
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