Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
