Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Randomize
