I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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